''Halo: The Fall of Reach'' Fan Trailer Script
After viewing that horrifically random trailer for a "Bollywood style" Halo film that IGN made for April Fools, and thus having it stuck in my head, I got inspired to write up my own trailer script for should the film ever get made. Enjoy, enjoy. (Note: Play the music once you reach that reading point in the video. They are placed to be parallel to the actual line they start at.) Transcript (Fade in to a medium shot of an old man, Leeroy, a retired Marine, as he sits by a fireplace with his grandson Ermey on his lap.) Old Leeroy: The UNSC-Covenant War… Those were tough times, my boy. In those days, we were always hiding… always fighting… always dying. Those were the days of the Covenant, the colonies… and the Spartans. Ermey:(excitedly) You fought with a Spartan?! What were they like? Old Leeroy: (chuckles) Well, my boy, they were some pretty interestingly fellows. (Cut to a young Leeroy, now a Marine.) Old Leeroy: (voiceover) Sometimes, they just wouldn’t stop tradin’ weapons with ya! Young Leeroy: (receives M7/Caseless Submachine gun) Thank you. (Receives a Plasma Pistol) Thank you. (Receives a SR Battle Rifle) Thank you. (Receives a Fuel Rod Gun; enthusiastic) THANK YOU! (Receives MA5C Assault Rifle) Oh! Uh, thank you. (Receives a Brute Spiker) Thank you. (Receives a Rocket Launcher) THANK YOU! (Receives a single Spike Grenade) Uhh, what?! (Receives a Plasma Rifle; annoyed) Thank you! (Receives a Mongoose.) Uhhhhh, thank you? (Cut to Old Leeroy.) Old Leeroy: Sometimes they just wouldn’t stop starin’ at you! (A Spartan walks up to Young Leeroy and stares. When Leeroy pretends that he isn’t noticing, the Spartan just steps closer. Leeroy looks confused.) Young Leeroy: Is this a staring contest? (Turns eagerly to face the Spartan.) Oh, I’m good at that! (Cut to Old Leeroy.) Old Leeroy: Sometimes they just hated you being in the same vehicle with them! (Young Leeroy climbs in to drive a Warthog when the Spartan smacks his head.) Ow! Alright, I’ll move to shotgun! (Leeroy climbs into the passenger seat, but the Spartan just smacks his head again.) Ow! Alright, I’ll move to actual shotgun! (Leeroy climbs over to the Gauss turret but the Spartan simply pushes him out and drives away.) Ahh! (He gets up and sees the leaving Warthog.) Aw, come on, you’re just going to make me walk the whole way?!?! (Cut to Old Leeroy.) Old Leeroy: Sometimes they just shooting you for no reason! (Young Leeroy yells as the Spartan shoots him in the rear with a Pistol.) Ow! Hey, there’s no achievement for TK’s! (He gets shot again.) Ahh! Do I LOOK like a Grunt to you?! (The Spartan shoots him again.) Ow! You do know this is borrowed, right? (The Spartan shoots his helmet off.) Hey, no hurting the lucky hat! I… need that.. (Leeroy jogs over to retrieve it but the Spartan simply thunks him on the head and runs away.) (Cut to Old Leeroy.) Old Leeroy: Sometimes they didn’t even know how to cooperate with you in battle! (Young Leeroy yells as the Grunt he was fighting is instantly head-shot by the Spartan.) Hey, can’t you leave something for me to finish? (Points to a nearby Brute Chieftain.) Here, let me get him, okay? (The Spartan shrugs, and Leeroy dashes forward with his Assault Rifle.) Alright chums, I'm back! Let's do this... LEEROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOY… (The Brute Chieftain sends him flying off with his Gravity Hammer, before giving a confused look to the Spartan. The Spartan immediately snipes him then keeps moving.) (Cut to Old Leeroy.) Old Leeroy: And sometimes they could be just downright vicious! (Young Leeroy is standing at guard when a Plasma Grenade suddenly gets stuck on his chest. The other Marines jump for cover but Leeroy simply remains standing there staring at the smoldering grenade on his chest. With a look of unimaginable grief and frustration, he screams up to the heavens): Not AGAAAIIIN!!!!! (The grenade explodes and blasts him away.) (Cut to Old Leeroy.) Old Leeroy: But in battle… (Cut to Leeroy’s plattoon. A frontal shot encases them as they charge slowly toward the camera. The men all have their guns at the ready and show no sign of fear. The Spartan is in the forefront, Leeroy right behind, while the other brave Marines enflank him. Slowly they continue charging toward the camera, feet pounding the sand with silent yells filling the air. After what seems like an eternity, the Spartan begins raising his Assault Rifle, pointing it straight into the eye of the camera, into the heart of enemy, before they leap off of the cliff and dive into the attack. The plattoon slams into a battalion of Brutes and Grunts, blasting and firing all the while. While Leeroy and his troops work together to fight off the squads of Grunts and Jackals, the Spartan however, does not hide, instead leaping about, jumping straight into Brutes, bowling them over while their shots bounce harmlessly off his armor. Reaching the Chieftain, he blasts his Assualt Rifle into its face while using his other gun to blow the brains out of any Covenant in his way. As they finish clearing the small plain they just charged into, blast out any arriving enemy aircraft, and then destroy the unfinished turret that the Covenant were building, the Spartan motions to the Marines to move on, and they all leap off into the valley below.) (Fade to black.) Old Leeroy: (voiceover) Those Spartans were legends, wizards, heroes! Never saw anything any bit more powerful than they were. Everytime they were with us in battle, we knew they would save all our lives. Ermey: (voiceover) There was one place they couldn’t save though, right? (The title: “Halo:The Fall of Reach” fades into the foreground.) Old Leeroy: (voiceover) Yes, there was one. (End music. Cut to release date and publishing credits.) (Cut to Young Leeroy and the Spartan, still stuck in their staring contest.) Young Leeroy: At least BLIIIIIIIIINK!!' ''(Cut to closing credits.) Young Leeroy: (voiceover) Ha-ha, I win! (A Shotgun blast is heard. A short pause follows.) Never mind…